I haven't posted on this blog for awhile because two people very dear to me experienced major medical mishaps. For one of them, it involved her lung, for the other, her brain. I think we can all agree that those are very important body parts and that having a mishap with those is pretty distressing. Both women are on the mend now, lung a little ahead of brain, but they are going in the right direction. This has calmed me enough to take a moment to have a midlife crisis about turning 50 this past week.
None of my other birthdays has ever impacted me. That's because everyone is older than I am. Now, you may be thinking: "That's not possible, Rhonda. There's a rather large percentage of the world's population that's younger than you are." But, no. You are wrong.
I was born a late-in-life "surprise" baby. My sisters were in high school and college when I was born. That means that I am the baby. Am. Still. Forever. Not only am I the baby sister, but in my extended family, I am also the baby cousin. Still. Forever. Whenever I have a birthday, it makes other people feel old, not me.
Plus, I married Ricky, who is 7 years older than I am. He has a large circle of childhood friends. When we hang out with them, I am always the youngest. They will be talking about music or life events that I can't exactly relate to, and then everyone is reminded: "Oh, Rhonda is only age X." ONLY.
But this effect is often counteracted by my being a high school teacher. I spend five days a week around 200 people who were born somewhere between 1997 and 2000. Yes, 2000! Last week I mentioned to one class that the last time I was in New York, I was in a small theater in Chelsea that had a big celebrity in the audience. I gleefully said to them: "It was Jake Gyllenhaal!"
Silence. No reaction. And then one girl said, "Who's that?"
That's right. I was in a room full of people for whom Jake Gyllenhaal is TOO OLD to be culturally relevant. Yet Jake Gyllenhaal is TOO YOUNG for me. Midlife crisis.
So I was complaining to my friend who is recovering from major lung surgery about how I am having a midlife crisis.
"I want to go backpacking through Europe!" I whined.
"You can still do something like that," she said in her comforting, always practical way. "They have these hostels where you can stay, elderhostels."
Elderhostels! If I am having a midlife crisis, I do not want to stay somewhere that has elder in the name! I did not yell this at her because I am very compassionate. But still.
I'll just have to console myself yet again with the fact that Lenny Kravitz is my age. (Click on Lenny to see why that is a source of comfort.)
P.S. Ricky's reaction when previewing this post was: "Jake Gyllenhaal is not too young for you. You are too old for Jake Gyllenhaal."
